Seriously......

Let's talk about American Idol for a moment, shall we?  We pretty much have to since Grey's Anatomy was a damn rerun last night.  What the hell?  When I was a kid, albeit many decades ago, they NEVER showed reruns during the regular season.  Reruns were for summer - why, all of a sudden is this basic rule of television being broken?  I'm a little bugged - can you tell?  Anyway, let's get back to American Idol.

Can you seriously imagine that not one, but BOTH of the people who totally needed to be sent home are still in it?  Sucking really bad, I might add - but still in it nonetheless.  In case you're wondering which two I mean, here's a breakdown for you:

This would be Sanjaya.  I know you were wondering when Michael Jackson joined the cast of American Idol, weren't you?  Alas, it's not Michael - it's Sanjaya.  Who wants to be Michael and is as scary as Michael.  But he's really no Michael.  Because if you remember, before Michael turned into the freak on a leash that he currently is, he was actually talented.  Before he had his entire faced bondo-ed and before he started liking little boys, we all thought he was the coolest thing around.  Admit it - you thought he was cool.  Then he turned into a freak and no one wanted to admit that they wore out their Thriller record from playing it so many times.  But we all know the truth.  We used to all heart Michael.  And it's ok.

But Sanjaya on the other hand - not so much.  He has way too much sugar in his tank for my liking.  Not that there's anything wrong with having sugar in one's tank, mind you.  Sanjaya isn't even gay - he's like "super gay!"  Again, not that there's anything wrong with that.  I can't emphasize that point enough.  Nothing wrong with it.  However, he really needed to be the next one to go because honestly, he sucks.  He's so bland & boring - he's about as exciting as watching paint dry.  No charisma, what's so ever.  And the fact that his hair is prettier then mine bugs me just a little too.

Needless to say, I was as stunned as he was when old AJ got the boot and Sanjaya did not.  AJ sucked too but not quite as bad as Sanjaya, IMO.  So we get to suffer through another week of Casper Milktoast with his pretty hair and his scary ass smile.  Lord, help us all.

As far as the chicks go, guess who I hate?  Go on, take a guess?  And isn't it poetic justice when a photographer catches a really unattractive shot of people who think that they are all that AND a bag of chips?  I love when that happens.

Let's talk about Antonella, shall we?  Why exactly is she still on the show?  Is it because people hope that by keeping her on, more pictures of her boobs will become available on the internet?  I, for one, could care less about her OR her boobs.  She's terrible - and she thinks she's great which makes it even worse.  She was so excruciatingly bad on Wednesday that my dogs nearly started howling.  She was like nails on a chalkboard.  And let's talk about the dress for a moment - want to?  What the hell is that?  I'm almost positive that my sister had a bathrobe that was exactly like that when she was about 7.  Seriously.  Who wears crap like that?  Granted, I'm not a fashion maven, not even close.  I actually have dreams that I'm going to end up on that "What Not to Wear" show - being berated by Stacey & Clinton on national TV.  I could probably use their help, if the truth be known.  But damn, that dress on Antonella was u-g-l-y.  Now I'm sure I'm a little bitter because I doubt she's ever been called a fat ass - but still.  I wouldn't be caught dead in that train wreck of an outfit - skinny or fat.

But back to her singing.  Is it just me or is she really terrible?  I think she's really terrible because a lot of the other ones totally rock.  So how is it that she's still around?  Does she just have a huge ass family who's burning down the voting phone lines?  That must be it because it certainly isn't any of us voting for her.  Like Sanjaya, she was stunned too.  So when she thinks she's going and then someone else goes in her place - the cosmos are not aligned properly.  And non-aligned cosmos mean that we have to suffer through Antonella for one more week too.  So unfair, isn't it?

Finally, what the hell is up with Kellie Pickler?  She was never my favorite last season since we all know that country music makes me want to shove sharp, hot pokers directly into my eyeballs.  But aside from that small point, I have two words to say about her: breast augmentation.  Apparently the profits from her record that no one knows that she made have been used to buy herself a set of larger breasts.  Personally, I would have bought a pool - but that's just me...

Which contestants do you dislike the most?  Please share - inquiring minds want to know...

Comments

[Uncle Garr]

I only watch AI peripherally, through my 9 1/2 year old daughter. The only thing that struck me was how much Phantonella looks like Sofia Coppola ~ particularly in your screen cap!

As far as Kellie Pickler, I too have two words to say about her new rack: Rosie O'Donnell. Wouldn't surprise me a bit if Rosie popped for her new set because she just L-O-V-E-S Kellie Pickler so much. (*rolls eyes*)

You are so good w/ your reviews, Sade. Wish you'd start watching "24" for me...would dig reading those opinions as well!

XO

[Uncle Garr]

P.S. Ol' Sanjay looks a wee bit like Barack Obama in your screen cap w/ those big-ass teeth!

[Mach One]

I have three words – “raging teenage hormones”. Walking hormones voting based on looks rather than singing ability. That is the only reasonable explanation I have for those two still being on AI.

I had no doubt in my mind that both were packing their bags. We can only hope next week will bring an end to the suffering.